How did my mental health issues influence how I wrote Me and Her : a Memoir of Madness?
After parents at my school harassed me for over a year, I developed crippling anxiety and severe insomnia, tormented each night by night terrors. At the same time, I became hypomanic, feeling elated, speaking and writing so fast in between pacing back and forth. An irresistible urge to write overwhelmed me as I wrestled with the emotional changes brewing deep inside.
My creative writing grew into an obsessive compulsion to express myself for the first time ever. My journals accompanied me everywhere, as I recorded my thoughts, feelings and observations, trying to make sense of the overpowering confusion and mood changes.
After I was committed to a psyche hospital, I interviewed doctors, nurses and patients questioning theirs and my sanity. I wrote ‘Harnessing Bipolarity’ and ‘Mental Health without Drugs,’ so ironic, these versions later melding into my memoir.
My second episode was far severe than the first, my mania quickly catapulting into psychosis. I experienced the weirdest blackest dreams, had conversations with God and the Dead and I sought out the Living to heal and to perform experiments on them. Each day I detailed these encounters in my notebooks, developing into intriguing chapters in my memoir.
On my journey to recovery, my writing became cathartic as I strove for long-term stability. I analysed Bipolar books and my past searching for answers that would save me and keep me healthy. I was determined to understand my illness, attending therapy sessions to learn coping strategies, and develop my own wellness plan. I acquired more insight into my illness, understanding how and why Bipolar Disorder developed in the first place. This self- knowledge lead me to understand my triggers and how to avoid them.
Later I joined a writers group and the Queensland Writing Centre and learnt how to write from the bottom up, redrafting my memoir many times, aiming for perfection and further insight into my illness so I could help others.
My mental health issues influenced every aspect of my Memoir. From my initial stress and anxiety, developing into full-blown Bipolar Disorder to my recovery and hope for the future. Me and Her: a Memoir of Madness is now complete, ready to share with you the Reader.
1 comments:
Thanks Alex,
For inviting me to be a Guest Blogger on your Teen Writer page. Thanks too for posing that question
...You made me really think on how my Memoir developed...Karen :))
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